Which Jellybean Did Lev Eat?

Do you remember this scene from ‘Most Famous Short Film of All Time’?

One week ago, I published a novel. I promised my more-than-one-dozen email subscribers I’d tell you when it came out, and I must follow through and tell you: The book is ready. I‘m reluctant to self-promo — evidently, having waited an entire week post-release to announce a new book — but I remind myself that you deserve to be taken at face value, you, the more-than-one-dozen of you who signed up for emails because you liked something I once wrote. (“Not someone else. You.”) You said you wanted an occasional email from me of matters of great importance, and here we are.

Now that you know I’ve got a novel out, I should remind you what it’s about.

It’s 455 pages in paperback. No one is responsible for reading anything this length. You like short online articles. That’s why you’re online right now. I will tell you that the paperback weighs as much as an eight-week-old kitten and is gloriously and laboriously visually formatted. I spent so much of my life staring at it that I’m convinced it was born from my eyeballs.

Let Me Not Talk About What’s In It

If you wanted to know what’s in Most Famous Short Film of All Time, you’d read the novel, right? But instead…